Compassionate Caregiving Conversations
Lessons from a Caregiver, my book on elder care, came into being because of the unending stream of queries that has come my way from care givers, family members, elders and even health care professionals. It used to be culinary advise. Now it has expanded. When a friend asked, “Why don’t you write a book that shares what you’ve been learning?” I started getting excited about the possibility of helping others caring for elders, ill or injured patients.
The process of writing and publishing a book is an exquisite mixture of excitement and excruciating torment. Once I decided to write an ElderCaring book to share thoughts and happy victories, finding ways to bring joy into the lives of elders, I could hardly wait to see it in print. It was months of sorting out thoughts, organizing words to say just exactly what I meant. It was edit, edit, rewrite, then hit that wall of not finding the words that go next. Dream. Some of my best insights appear from my dreams. I awake in the night with an answer to a question or situation that had been plaguing my waking hours.
Learning is a continuing path. Very soon after Lessons was sent to print, I experienced a profound on-the-job lesson. As thrilled as I was by the learning, I was crushed with disappointment knowing that it was too late to include it in my book. It is now two years later and I have an avenue to share that lesson. It’s one tiny little thing that will only help in one narrow situation and yet it looms large.
Many of us experience a stage in caring for a frail elder when safety becomes precarious. The elder can’t hold it in his or her memory or won’t listen, regarding safety and the risk of falling. Too often an elder will try to get up or walk without waiting for help. Too often a serious injury occurs from a fall. As a caregiver one cannot watch every moment. There are still loads of laundry and dishes and other duties to manage. This is it, the lesson: reverse Whoopie cushions! Actually called pressure cushions, there exists a kind of chair cushion that can be placed on a seat. The elder sits just like always. The cushion has a attached battery operated device that makes a huge and horrible warning sound if the elder lifts off the cushion. The reaction is immediate. Startled, the elder sits down again before a fall can occur. (more…)
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